Ugly Betty Snydrome?

I rarely watch TV these days. Recently, as I was looking to see what’s on, I ended up watching a whole episode of Ugly Betty on the TV Guide channel. Ha.

The basic plot line was nothing out of the ordinary. Betty has a crush on this musician in her building throughout the whole episode, only to find her pretty coworker, Amanda, making out with him at the end. Betty is obviously upset at Amanda for stealing the dude, but she also feels defeated, thinking, of course the guy would pick Amanda, she is prettier.

Then Amanda says,

“You know, Betty, you’re lucky. When someone falls in love with you, it’s real. I have never had that. I never know if I’m loved for who I am or because I’m so pretty.”

What the freaks. Terrible comforting words .. wow.

At the same time, I do think like that too. “Maybe he doesn’t like me, I’m not as pretty as (blank), etc.” All these comparisons. Why do I do that. I know looks is not the only reason of why a boy would like a girl. And if it is, would I want him anyway?

Sometimes I feel like other variables may have replaced “looks” for young adults. Yeah, looks is still important, but I hate the reality that relationships for the adult world can become a mathematical equation of steady income, future outlook, family background, children skills, blah blah blah.

Of course, it should no longer just be about the butterflies in our stomaches like at the 8th grade dance, but I want to believe that special connection between a boy and a girl still exists. I believe God has a special person for me, for us. It has to be more than just a “comfortable” and “stable” life. It has to be!!

Yes, of course I want to marry a “good” guy, but I don’t want to be with someone just because he is a good guy. There are great guys who may not be fitting for me! People say you can learn to love somebody if you die to yourself. That is probably true, but marriage is hard work, so I’m sure there will be plenty of days when I will have to learn that. I want someone that I was meant to be with, you know? Is that too idealistic these days?

I guess we’ll find out when I’m 50 or something.